Seven Reasons Patrick Stewart is Awesome...

Patrick Stewart is - quite simply, awesome! I am declaring this a fact of the universe which cannot be argued, criticised or discussed in any manner. It is as true as saying London is England's capital city, there are twenty two pounds in a kilogram, and Jimmy Saville fixed it for hundreds of underage children in the 1970's. Of course, we live in a world loaded in cynicism, so for those who question my unquestionable fact, let me explain seven reasons why Professor Picard, is the king of kings…

1. He is a working class hero.

Most males born into poverty stricken families of the grim British North – especially during the first half of the 20th century, found their lives a ruthless diet of gritty manual labour, piss-poor healthcare, and lard sandwiches. For Partick Stewart however, slaying the forceful beast of society was his calling, and the life of an actor was all he ever desired. Years after global domination, the now Knighted Sir Patrick keeps his roots firmly grounded in his Yorkshire past, and reminds us all that dreams can become realities; even with a stomach loaded with second-hand Hovis and spam.

2. He dressed as a crab for Halloween.
Celebrities are an often pretentious bunch. Image obsessed, lost in the fear of how many twitter followers than can ‘win’, and pretending to be 'street' so nobody will remember the gold-plated toilet containing its own butler; in their twenty-six bedroom house, Patrick is none of the sort. Posting regular photos of sheer awesomeness through his Twitter feed - purely for the sake of it, he is a man at complete comfort with himself, and has no need for personal acceptance. Can you ever imagine the Will Smith’s or Wayne Rooney’s of the world, as the above photo?

3. He went completely bald at 18, and is now an anti-hirsute icon.
For any 30 something or older male, hairloss is an acceptable portion of maturity. Some accept it and move on, others purchase wigs and convince themselves no one can tell. To experience the agony of total baldness before this age, requires an iron will; able to handle the barrage of slaphead jokes and references to walking around with a head which looks like a penis. For the teenage Partick Stewart, this was a painful reality. Where most would have faded into the dark agony of shame and superglue, this was the eventual measure of the awesome one, and proved to the world that what is inside a head is of greater importance, than what lies atop it. He made baldness cool; after all, how many chrome-domes were around before the Next Generation first aired?

4. He carried the Olympic Flame.
A man who loves his nation, without hating on those across the world is a good dude. A man who enjoys global events which unite our planet, is also a good dude. A man in his seventies who can run between mass crowds in the street purely for the fun of it, is – when especially combined with the other two, awesome.

5. He supports charitable and liberal causes.
In general, politicians are scumbags. Self-serving snakes deceiving the world purely to serve their own agendas of power - to aid the insecurities they never dealt with, we spend our lives listening to them pretend to care about the masses; until the one with the cleanest smelling bullshit wins a seat to grow even more corrupt in. Patrick Stewart is none of that. A true liberal icon, his philosophy is one of allowing everyone the fundamental freedom to do as they wish, just as long as nobody is hurt in the process. Women’s equality? Check. Assisted Suicide by choice? Go for it. Awareness of the horrors of war, he's there! The man does not see colour, culture, class or power, he just sees people; and is all the more awesome for doing so.

6. He is a one half of the world’s greatest senior double act.
Like an aging Northern Krankies, the comedy duo of Ian Mackellen and Patrick Stewart - or Professor Xavier and Magneto to some, are a regular feast of entertainment. Whether gathering selfies with Elmo from Sesame Street, or taking shots of their heads on the rear of a metal bull’s arse, the duo are unadulterated comedy gold. Like a modern Laurel and Hardy, Paddy and Ian are a fierce combination of sheer awesome.

And finally….

7. He announced his marriage on twitter; with this photo…

And there you have it. Patrick Stewart - you are awesome! I am declaring this a fact of the universe which cannot be argued, criticised or discussed in any manner; unless you are William Shatner, that is. If aliens ever visit earth, you would be the one man I would want to represent us...

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Indy.

"Indy - sticking her tongue out to cancer!"

Indy is a 10-year-old Jack Russell Terrier residing in Slough, England; with her doting mother Wendy Phillips and family. As you would expect, Indy is a typically loveable yet crazy member of her breed. Bold, brazen, and with the exception of random ironing boards falling atop of her; due to an accidental scare in the early days, is fearless as they come. She is – like all dogs, a lover, and – unlike all dogs, loved in return; living the life any canine born onto this planet deserves without question.

While loved by human hearts, the hand of nature has dealt her a much crueller blow; one I feel is worth documenting. Recently, the usual bouncy Indy had become lethargic and unwell. A quick trip to the vets and a dose of antibiotics later improved her condition, yet was still miles away from her usual effervescent self. Following deeper evaluation in the form of a blood test and X-ray, it was discovered Indy required surgery in the form of a splenectomy; due to a mass found on her organ. The worst possible news for her family, was followed by the dreaded phone call; explaining the genuine possibility she may not make it through the night; due to the excess blood loss.

Indy however – loved, strong, and with the heart of a jack Russell, pulled through. Yet she was still diagnosed with blood cancer; in the form of lymphoma. With a lack of time to deduce whether her form was either the B or T cell; B responds to treatment, whereas T does not, and once she had regained some strength, her family scraped together as much money as they could, and agreed a course of reductive chemotherapy. In a short space of time she had gone from playful pet with a clean bull of health, to brave cancer fighting warrior. Unfortunately, and for anyone who has lived it or loved anyone who has will attest, it does literally change lives; and in my view explains why there is nothing more important in this world to fight than cancer... nothing.

At this present date in May 2014, Indy is due her fifth session of chemotherapy. She is responding to treatment well; her lymph nodes are all down, and she bounces around like Tigger at a tea party. But the reality cannot be ignored. As yet there is no cure for her illness, and the Phillips family remain aware she has anywhere for six to eighteen months left to enjoy life. For them, the decision to let her sleep for an eternity in doggy heaven, or allow her to fight and live in her rightful place as family member was incredibly difficult, but it is guaranteed she will be loved for every last day of her life; something no ugly cancer can ever take away…

I write this article because in three weeks I run my first ever half-marathon (13.1 miles) here in England, in order to raise money for the charity, Animal Cancer Trust. Their mission is to encourage awareness, education, and work towards ridding the awful disease in animals; as much as we try to do for our own species, and lessen the blow of situations like Indy’s as much as possible. We as humans give so much of ourselves trying to defeat cancer, we often forget our precious pets are no more immune than we are.  

There are countless stories of a similar nature which take place across the globe on a daily basis; the majority are rarely heard, never seen, and are lived as a silent form of suffering within the close knit community of a family unit. Please donate, and help us reach the magical target of £1,000 for Animal Cancer Trust before June 8^th, 2014. I can run the necessary miles, but every last charitable payment you donate, carries each step forward in both completing a marathon, and ultimately, defeating cancer!  And should you have any stories of your own similar to these, please feel free to contact me via my Facebook page, and I will do my best to share each one, and raise awareness to your personal story. Thank you.

CLICK HERE to sponsor my run for Animal Cancer Trust

https://www.justgiving.com/LeeGunnell

Clean Your House Naked.

"Who needs clothes?"

While beta religions, the terminally insecure, and controllers of under-nourished alien-alike Supermodels have conditioned us to believe exposed skin is shameful. None of them can argue against a fact of life, as true now as it was the day Adam popped out of God. When we arrive in this world, we are stark-bollock-naked; or stark-booby-naked, for girls. No halo, no hijab, no rabbit onesie with floppy ears; just a chubby little miracle, naked. 

With the exception of uber-fatties; whose physical abuse leaves them requiring a JCB winch just to break wind, our species has every right to take pride in its physical form. Who can argue a logical reason to regale in horror at the sight of nipples on a chest, hairs on an arse, or sexual organs vital in the process of reproduction? This irrational fear wasn’t the case in years past. Primal tribes never covered their knobs because strangers screamed on sight of them, they did so to avoid chills, and stop tigers from using them as a mid-afternoon snack - shame never entered the equation.

While wise to cover our particulars in public places; for hygiene and safety reasons, there is no such need in the security of your own home. For this reason, you are going to rekindle your relationship with an old friend; your body. I want you to get down to those domestic chores as usual, only this time, naked as the halo-less day you were born. 

Wash those windows, scrub that toilet basin, change those freshly ironed sheets, and vacuum those carpets with the bliss of abandonment; no one else is around, unless you have pets – but they couldn’t give a shit either way. I must stress to the males, pervy thoughts and vacuum cleaners are a dangerous mix; unless you want to give fire-fighters and paramedics a funny story to use, for a decade of Christmas anecdotes.

Naked cleaning will leave you feeling fresh, liberated, and most importantly, slightly more comfortable in your skin then an hour previous. Sure, it may sag, wobble, and contain hairy moles in odd places. But this is how God – or whatever God is, made you. Rejoice in your body, and improve your days by getting to know this wonderful tool again; it is so much more appealing, then you allow yourself to realise…

Excerpt taken from eBOOK - "31 Ways to Improve Your Days". Available below; click on link to visit...

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