Whim in the Gym.

I don't want to lose a limb and end up competing in the special Olympics, as I don't feel there is anything really very special about only having one leg. Besides which I kind of enjoy walking, and doing squats and leg-presses at the gym - I can leg press 450 kilos for ten full reps. This is me bragging as a form of validation seeking, in case you failed to grasp the notion. There is a guy at my gym by the name of Mark. He is confined to a wheelchair and has no use of his body below the waist, yet he has been a regular to the place since before I arrived back in February. So, in all honesty, perhaps there is something quite special about the paralympians after all. He gets in more physical activity in a day then the average person does in a week. And he seems like a cool guy, with some funky tattoos to boot.
Speaking of the gym, and more to the point, Fitness First. They sent me a letter this morning, telling me that due to the increase in VAT form 17.5% to 20.0% come the beginning of the New Year, they will be raising the price of my monthly membership - in order to maintain the high quality service, of course.. what they fail to mention is why due to an increase of VAT of 2.5%, my monthly membership price has increased by a full 10.0%?, I know businesses need to make money, but doing this to every member will add them an extra 500,000 pounds or so a month alone. Recession my foreskin.
In all honesty, I would rather that instead of patronizing me with bullshit about running costs and high service, just write the letter as such...

'Dear Mr Gunnel (They spell my surname wrong).

As we are greedy, ruthless, money grabbing barstads, who want to flinch every single penny we possibly can from our members, we are whacking the price of your membership up by a hell of a lot of dosh, and using the shit economy as the perfect excuse to do so. And you can't sue us because we fucked you on the small print when you joined us!
Oh yes, also, if you die... we're still taking money out your direct debit... prick!

Regards,
Fitness First.


This I would respect. As Diego Maradona once said 'I have more respect for someone who has the guts to tell me they hate me, because it means they have guts.

Still, not to worry, I do get to eye up the super sexy Asian looking PT there every time I visit... isn't that right, Marissa! ;-)

I am off to bed now, as it is way past my bedtime. Goodnight all!

Lee Gunnell

No comments:

Post a Comment