|"We are not members of the BNP, thank you."|
It seems every man, woman, and short attention spanned child is enjoying the London 2012 Olympics. Unless you are one of the following, that is; an Aussie, Russian, A British swimmer, American China hater, miserable fatty, and Morrissey (Who doesn’t seem to enjoy anything). With this current wave of upbeat global celebrations - and the knowledge Team GB committed the mortal sin of a barren day of medal success, here are seven positive actions created by the 30th Olympiad;
1. National Pride: Waving me flag, waving me flag. Once upon a time, carrying a British flag meant you were either considered a racist, or stuck in the 1960’s. Whether overly jingoist or not, and even if millions are jumping on the Golden bandwagon, it doesn’t really matter. The British have something to carry with pride, beyond Bruce Forsythe and the PG Tips chimps… which cannot be a bad thing.
2. Funny Names: Lee Bumyoung (KOR), German Sanchez Sanchez (MEX), Alexander Alexandrov (BUL) and Alexander Alexandrov (AZR), Ali Hasan Mahboob, (BAH), Yoo Suk Kim (KOR), Yoshie Takeshita (JPN), Brent Newdick (NZL), Destinee Hooker (USA), Dong Dong (CHN), and Victoria Poon (CAN). There is nothing like laughing at completely normal names, which sound silly in your own language; though in Thai, Hoy means Fanny… so the announcent of our greatest Olympian, may receive a few sniggers In the land of smiles.
3. Paralympics: Personally, I like the idea of the Paralympics, but don’t have much of an interest in it. Over two million tickets have been sold so far – due to the UK wanting to continue the feel good factor of these Games a few weeks after. Kinda selfish, perhaps, but being disabled and performing in front of 80,000 curious newcomers, is a welcome change to winning gold in front of an arena covered in silence and blue seats. Coupled with the awareness it creates, Britain’s biggest achievement in 2012 could be the "special" Olympics. Note: don’t call these dudes special; it is exceptionally patronising. However, we are allowed to laugh at the midgets; I don't make the rules, that's just how it is.
4. Christmas Presents For Men: “Mrs Brownlee’s Boys” “Around The Pendleton” “Medals Of Honour” “Farrah and Away” and so forth. The festive season promises a veritable feast of books, DVD’s, socks, and merchandise celebrating our host of summer medallists. Most will end up in a Poundland by 2014, but as stocking fillers go, it sure beats another shower gel/deodorant set of Lynx Africa; or a pair of Bart Simpson socks - also from Poundland.
5. Health Awareness: The best factor of the Olympic Games, is it will get many people who have no idea what a Smith Machine or Incline Flies are, into the gym. The worst factor of the Olympic Games, is it will get many people who have no idea what a Smith Machine or Incline Flies are, into the gym. Okay, this is for personal reasons; I love empty gyms. But getting our fat nation back on its feet and sweating hard, is a welcome bonus. In a world of junk food, Eastenders, and X-Box marathons, perhaps one day, when kids ask their mates if they want to play football, they won't reply with "I can't, me joypad's busted!"
6. Sailing Language: Ben Ainslee is a machine, and rightly regarded as one. But hearing the commentator mention how he kept getting knots in his downward pump, whilst producing dirty air as he reached the backdraft; to the point he needed to bear off with his head up, had me in stitches. Sailors are known for cursing in every third word, with terms like this, it is no wonder why.
7. Inspiring A Generation: Watching a few solitary Gold medals in 1992 as an eleven year old, inspired me to workout, to run, and to undertake all sorts of crazy physical exertions. While I never reached the heights of the Olympians, somewhere over these past two weeks, many young boys and girls will pick up a Tennis racket, punch a few armchairs, or run a few laps of a local park, and maybe one day, they too will be the heroes they aspire to replicate. The added bonus for them, it is the same feeling I felt, times by an unimaginable amount. I guess old Seb Coe achieved his goals after all - besides shitty ticketing systems, that is. Yep, I still haven't let it go.
Until the next time…