Pages

Marissa.

I have an amazing girlfriend. She is intelligent yet silly, organized but subversive, tough, innocent, naive and beautiful. I take her for granted more often than not. She works a pretty tough job and manages to sustain the ability to get through all the hours her career entails, but, even though sometimes it gets her down and she loses track of herself, she never gives in and always fights till the end goal is achieved. At many times I can be a very hard person to get along with. I am stubborn, deeply opinionated, and if my mind is in the right (or should I say wrong) frame of mind, will attempt to force my opinion onto others - this, according to the book by M,Scott Peck, is the definition of what evil really is. Yet, even though she gets frustrated and annoyed about the ideas and standpoints I have on the world, I believe that beyond it all, she has a genuine understanding that I am a man of good heart and intentions, as much as I do towards her. She is not perfect, no one is, but she is perfect for me, and vice versa... and that is really all that matters.

Marissa, I love you. And when I tell you I love you so much that there are no words to formulate a true definition of this feeling, then laugh as if I am being silly, I am in fact being as honest as I can be. And I hope that you know just how much of a positive influence you are on my life. I am a very complex person. I can be arrogant, pretentious, shallow, misogynistic, rude and sometimes very hostile. But I will never let another person cause you any harm or insecurity whatsoever, and will release the sleeping monster inside of me anytime that they do. I have always written for me, but now perhaps I do this for the both of us. I don't know if we will make it through the stresses of life and the rigors of the world, but if we do, and I hope we do, then the glories will be endless, and the miseries will be handled. This is the moment now where I should neg you passively, just to make sure you do not take this message for granted, and so I don't feel this blog is a load of rampant chumping, the kind I see so often by 99% of men in the world. But I will do this in person next time we see each other...

Lee Gunnell.

No comments: